Thursday, January 12, 2012

Friday Fun Facts

I'm going to title this version of Friday Fun Facts "Things I Learned While My Husband Was In The Hospital". 

1.  If you are desperate for a nurse to come in to give your loved one pain medicine, just do something that is INCREDIBLY awkward that you never in a million years would want someone to see you doing.  I'll list a few examples:  pick your nose, fart (loudly), change your clothes, check out the itchy spot in your armpit, etc.  I guarantee you that the nurse will show up at the most inopportune moment for you.  Not that I would know. No, I wouldn't know about ANY of those examples.  Not one.  

2.  The croup sounds very similar to the moose on this commercial.  Except like, 491 times louder.  All day.  And. All. Night.

3.  Would you like to pull out the chair to make it into a 2x6 bed?  Well, you won't be able to. 

4.  Number 3 is really okay because once you have it out you won't be able to get it back together. 

5.  Once you finally have it back together, you will sit down on the "chair" and start getting kind of comfortable it will somehow mysteriously end up falling apart on you and looking like this: 

Yeah.  It's going to be a long night. That is, as SOON AS I FLIPPIN' FIGURE OUT HOW TO MAKE THIS DANG 2X6 BED!!  THEN it will be a long night.  AFTER that. 

But on the bright side, Jacob is feeling better than he was this morning.  He's even made a few jokes today and he's already taking machines off and wandering around without the permission of his nurses. NO JOKE. 

I don't think he has any idea that he should probably get permission to take all this stuff off and go wandering around his room. Lol. He gets tired of walking around and goes to lay back down in bed, pushes his nurse button and someone comes in and asks what he needs and when he says, "Can you put those things back on my leg and hook my IV back up?" they look a LITTLE taken aback. The nurse earlier kind of said, "Um...OH!" and had a look on her face that silently screamed, "what in the sam-hill are you doing wandering around without an IV and your leg things hooked up?!?" Haha.

So that's the bright side. He's moving around and joking around. On the other hand, he's pretty drugged up. They're giving him 2 different pain meds, one of which is morphine and he's getting it every hour. Earlier he said to me, "I can feel my intestines moving all around". Apparently things definitely feel a little off on the insides. He just doesn't care because he doesn't feel a whole lot right now. He'll probably be in plenty of pain when he comes home. Hopefully that will be tomorrow.  

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